Fluffy Ann

Sunday, April 24, 2005

Number Sixty-seven

"Though the pain is an ocean
Tossing us around, around, around
You have calmed greater waters
Higher mountains have come down...
I will sing of your mercy that leads me through valleys of sorrow to rivers of joy, yeah"
(Jars of Clay, "Valley Song")

"Say, won't you say,
Say that you love me
Love, ever love
Love everlasting
All my devotion
Put into motion by You
By You"
(Jennifer Knapp)

Friday, April 22, 2005

Number Sixty-six

It's amazing how many friends you can have in common with someone on Facebook and still not know them. I just found someone I have 18 friends in common with.... never met him.

Today is my brother's 17th birthday. Happy birthday, lil bro!! You're the man, Big J! And you're still the original J. Lo.... My brother is one bad drummer, boys and girls. This is his band's website: www.geocities.com/fightingeldiablo.

Tuesday, April 19, 2005

Number Sixty-five

"She's packin' her phallic symbol." (Dr. Gill referring to Eowyn)

Friday, April 15, 2005

Number Sixty-four

Quote of the day: "I'm like a little otter... a sexy little otter." (Stormy, Sealab2021)

Song:
"Come away with me in the night
Come away with me and I will write you a song

Come away with me on a bus
Come away with me where they can't tempt us
With their lies

I want to walk with you
On a cloudy day
In fields where the yellow grass grows knee-high
So won't you try to come

Come away with me and we'll kiss
On a mountaintop
Come away with me
And I'll never stop loving you

And I want to wake up with the rain
Falling on a tin roof
While I'm safe there in your arms
So all I ask is for you
To come away with me in the night
Come away with me."

(Norah Jones, "Come Away with Me")

I miss the safety of my old life. I miss the certainty of high school days, the times where the worst thing we did was skip class to go to TCBY. I miss my dear high school friends. There has been nothing later in my life like the intimacy that I shared with those friends. I have never had people who cared more deeply for me or encouraged me more in my personal growth and in my walk with God. Hannah, Beth, Allison: this is for you. I love you with all my heart and soul. To the ends of the earth. To quote Janie from Their Eyes Were Watching God, "Nobody else on earth kin hold uh candle tuh you, baby. You got de keys to de kingdom."

Tuesday, April 12, 2005

Number Sixty-three

"You cannot quit me so quickly.
Is no hope in you for me?
No corner you could squeeze me?
But I’ve got all the time for you, love [...]

The space between
Where you smile and hide,
That’s where you’ll find me if I get to go.

The space between
The bullets in our fire fight
Is where I’ll be hiding waiting for you.
The rain that falls
Splashed in your heart
Ran like sadness down the windowpane.

The space between
Our wicked lies
Is the hope to keep safe from pain.

Take my hand
Cause we’re walking out of here,
Right out of here.
Love is all we need, dear."

(Dave Matthews Band, "The Space Between")

Number Sixty-two

"How do you pick up the threads of an old life? How do you go on when in your heart you begin to understand there is no going back? There are some things that time cannot mend, some hurts that go too deep that have taken hold." (Frodo Baggins)

"I'm glad to be with you, Samwise Gamgee. Here at the end of all things." (Frodo Baggins)

What do I have in the end, "at the end of all things"? My family. And God. God, who Sam reminds me of when he says, "I can't carry it for you, but I can carry you."

The Lord is my light and my salvation-- whom shall I fear?
The Lord is the stronghold of my life-- of whom shall I be afraid?
When evil men advance against me to devour my flesh,
when my enemies and my foes attack me, they will stumble and fall.
Though an army besiege me, my heart will not fear;
Though war break out against me, even then will I be confident...
Though my father and mother forsake me,
the Lord will receive me. Psalm 27:1-3, 10

Saturday, April 09, 2005

Number Sixty-one

Ok, I actually wrote something at the end of this; so don't dismay. It's not just lyrics.

"I've been here before a few times
And I'm quite aware we're dying
And your hands, they shake with goodbyes
And I'll take you back if you'd have me

So here I am, I'm trying
So here I am are you ready

Come on let me hold you, touch you, feel you
Always
Kiss you, taste you, all night
Always

And I'll miss your laugh, your smile
I'll admit I'm wrong if you'd tell me
I'm so sick of fights, I hate them
Let's start this again for real."

(Blink 182, "Always")

"I'm coming out of my cage
And I've been doing just fine
Gotta gotta be down
Because I want it all
It started out with a kiss
How did it end up like this?
It was only a kiss, it was only a kiss...

Now I'm falling asleep,
And she's calling a cab
While he's having a smoke
And she's taking a drag
Now they're going to bed,
And my stomach is sick
And it's all in my head,
Yes, it's all in my head

But she's touching his chest now
He takes off her dress now
Let me go
I just can't look, it's killing me
And taking control

Jealousy, turning saints into the sea
Swimming through sick lullabies
Choking on your alibis
But it's just the price I pay
Destiny is calling me
Open up my eager eyes
Cause I'm Mr. Brightside"

(The Killers, "Mr. Brightside")

"Staring at a maple leaf
Leaning on the mother tree
I said to myself we all lost touch
Your favorite fruit is chocolate covered cherries
And seedless watermelon ohhhh
Nothing from the ground is good enough
Body rised
It puts over me

Oh chariot, your golden waves
are walking down upon this face
Oh chariot I'm singing out loud
To guide me
Give me your
strength

Remember seeking moons of birth
Rings made mirrors of the earth
The sun was just yellow energy
It is a living promise land
Even over fields of sand
Seasons fill my mind and
Cover me
From bringing back
More than a memory

You'll be my vacation away from this place
You know what I want
Holding that cup
It's pouring over the sides
Make me wanna spread my arms and fly."

(Gavin DeGraw, "Chariot")

These songs aren't quite in the order I wanted them, but the point is, they are the ones that have been chasing me lately. There has been a constant focus on garden/paradisal imagery for me recently. I have been absolutely enchanted by spring. For the past week, I have been watching flowers closely (especially the roses outside Smith Hall), studying bees unawaredly (is that a word?) pollinating flowers, and stared captivatedly (is that one?) at green buds pushing open. And just yesterday, I decided, with the help of Dr. Gill, to write my paper for the symposium about women and the spaces associated with them in The Lord of the Rings. Northrop Frye calls this the "feminine space of blissful repose." The garden is the ultimate archetype for the feminine space.

I have also been drinking beer the past couple of days. I hadn't had a drink in months before that. I also bought a bottle of Yellow Tail Shiraz-Cabernet. However, I didn't buy a corkscrew. Hmmm. That's what happens when you've never bought wine before... Well, I think I have a good beer buzz. Have ya'll ever heard that song-- shoot; I don't remember the artist-- "B double E double R-U-N, beer run!!" Josh Mallory played me that. It's not a country song, though there is one that sounds like that. Anyway, I don't know what all this intimacy with alcohol means either. I could analyze it, but you know what?? I have to write a paper.

Friday, April 08, 2005

Number Sixty

More Dr. Day quotes:
"People, beware of your friends. They will sometimes screw you into the woodwork using a power drill." (referring to Benedick in Much Ado about Nothing)

"I am tired of watching that bubble emit from your mouth like some elastic cud from some plastic cow." (referring to someone's chewing gum)

Dr. Gill quotes:

"I am a river unto my people."

"I am a merciful god."

And a Dr. LaBrant quote:
"It's kind of like having a really warm blankie and some warm milk." (referring to giving his students points for trying on exams)

All right. I'm going to write more later, but I have to go now. I don't know if this lab is open to just anyone.

Saturday, April 02, 2005

Number Fifty-nine

"From the fullness of His grace we have all received one blessing after another."
John 1:16 NIV